Domino Reaction

Dear Yossarian,
What's going on? I am Jewish and my boyfriend isn't. He is Christian. Our relationship is great and we are both thinking of taking it to the next level. I want him to convert, so our children can be raised with my beliefs. He doesn't want to and has asked me to become Christian. I don't want to, but as long as the whole future family is on the same page, isn't that what's important?

Pam

Dear Pam,
You say your relationship is great and I assume you mean the fucking is great. If religion is a large enough part in the two lives you both live (separately I might add) to try and change the other, then I got some good news and I got some bad news. The good news is you can start fucking nice Jewish boys. The bad news is my car insurance will triple because of German laws.
I don't know if everyone being on the same page is the best thing for a family. I mean, if my mom and dad were both making meth in the basement, while they were on the same page, I don't think it would have been very conducive of a nice upbringing.
I am not equating religion to meth. I like religion. Deal me in. I enjoy being Catholic. But variety is the spice of life.
Your children won't give a carpenter's shit what you people do. We Like to think that children are fragile and can't deal with a little strife. Wrong. Kids are the toughest people ever. It's when we get older and life gets a little hard we become pussies and blame our shortcomings on whatever may have happened. That way, everyone can be a victim.
A child has four thoughts. When are we going to eat? When can we play? When can I sleep? What's that shit taste like? Your children won't be thinking, "Hmmm. Mom and dad worship God in different ways. I am so confused. I should kill all the Jews and end this confusion once and for all." Nope. Your kids will figure it out. They aren't dumb, they are just dumb to the world. But what did you expect? They have never been here before. They can think and figure all sorts of shit out.
So the problem isn't with your future children. I mean, you aren't even pregnangt. Your take issue with something about your boyfriend. But there can't possibly be one thing wrong with a man who fucks you like he does, so let's use the kids as an excuse. Putz.
In summation, grow the fuck up and have some balls. Actually, that might fix most personal problems.