No. You Can't Borrow My Car
Right. I need a wife. I am fucking useless. I go grocery shopping yesterday and I have no food. I spent 200 dollars on gin, beer, tonic and mustard. Now, I don't recall being drunk when I was shopping yet this is what I deemed as crucial sustenance. Mustard. Jesus H. Christ. I didn't even buy bread to put the fucking mustard on. I am a dynamic man. As soon you will see as I present to you proof of how much I have grown over the past ten years of my life. I realize that my ten-year high school reunion is coming up and since I won't be invited, I thought I'd take the time to reflect on the man that was, is and will be Yossarian. I've got pictures to go along with it and all. It'll be great. But, probably not, it'll suck.
XTX sent me some music and I enjoy it. I'm not just saying that. My opinion means a lot on music because I have the most delicate musical palette known to man. Isn't that right Cocaine and K-Luv?
My non-TV-having-ass broke down and went to Best Buy and bought a 50-inch monstrosity. Fucking thing doesn't fit in the Acura so I have to wait till Monday before I can watch Smokey and the Bandit the way God intended. That would be on a 50-inch widescreen LCD HDTV in case you weren't tracking.
Puyallup WA is the ugliest city in the history of mankind. Sweet friggin Christ these bitches are ugly. No wonder Kurt shot himself.
I am slightly upset that as of yet no one desires my sage-like wisdom and advice. I know I still have a week left, but come on people I solve problems. That is what I do. I just solved my lack of a TV problem. Sheesh.
No Bill Gates, "ugliest" is a fucking word. Watch, I will use it in a sentence. I am not sure, but I think the woman I had sex with is the ugliest one I have literally come across yet. See.
posted by Yossarian at 7:34 PM
7 Comments:
i hope you really enjoyed the music. especially on accounta how it is the best music god ever allowed us to listen to. And i'm not even touching on just how dreamy rhett is when he's singing the lyrics or even how clever and witty and fun some of the lyrics happen to be. but, it's fine if you lie to me. it wouldn't be the first time that has happened.
make mustard shooters.
it happens that way sometimes.
All I know is it better not have acoustic guitars, or as I like to call them, anti-music makers.
Saw King Kong last night. I shouldn't have done that, seeing as how I'm already prone to crying for the plight of the modern monkey. Poor bastard.
Don't remind me of the reunion crap... I may be a year behind you, but it's still too damn close for comfort. I just got back from visiting STL and god I'm glad I'm outta there!
We need to get on cocaine's case to start one of these, so that we can all be giant gays with blogs.
Giant Gays With Blogs will be my next band's name
Best regards from NY! » » »
Post a Comment
<< Home