Right. I was terrified. I wanted to cry. I wanted to run away crying out to my mother begging forgiveness. "Oh lord forgive me I made a mistake. Please let me take back this one decision." I wanted the plane to crash. I wanted the bus to explode. I wanted a mistake with the paperwork to happen and for them not to let me in. I wanted to inexplicably slip and break my femur. But none of that happened. The plane landed safely. It's funny to remember how scared I was.
I move into my apartment tomorrow and my shit will be delivered to me Monday and I have to sleep on the floor this weekend and I don't have a TV and I will have to wait for the cable guy to come and hook up my internet before I can access the internet and I don't like my apartment because it is lame but it was available so I got it and this run on sentence is fun to write.
My apartment. Yes. Let us discuss. Lame. Lame as the day is long. It has shit that I suppose other people would like and think, "Gee Martha this sure is a swell place to live. The apartment is on top of a mountain and there is a big bay window overlooking a valley and it's pretty. There is a comfy looking window seat inside the big bay window. I'll bet I can read and drink hot chocolate and listen to the rain patter on the window in that seat while I smell the vegetable stew I'll be working on for a couple days cooking in the kitchen. It sure will be nice to snuggle up by the fireplace and listen to the rain hit the skylights in the vaulted ceilings while I watch a movie. I have my own washer and dryer and an obnoxiously large bathroom. Yes Martha, this is the place for me."
I however do not think such thoughts. No I think, "Where the hell is the dank? Where is the wood? Where is the dark creepiness that I love? Where is the intercom to buzz people in? Where is the noise of people? Where is the fat guy you have to walk around whom is always at the mailbox?" I like to pretend I live in a cave. I like to pretend I am batman. I do not like carpet. I hate scenic views of lakes and pines and a valley and goofy shit I could care less about. It's temporary though.
So. News. My nephew is in the Navy and he is stationed seven miles from me. He is married. Yes, married. To what I can only hope is a woman. I wrote about her a while back and I am too lazy to look it up and sneaky link it. But trust...she sucks. She is pregnant now. Yay. I call him yesterday and she gives me attitude. I tell her what she can do with her attitude and how if she pretends her attitude is a silver charger she would need to polish it up real nice and shiny, turn that sum bitch sideways and stick it straight up her ass. Well after that I got to talk with nephew dippy shitty. I invited him to dinner in a couple weeks and then I had to invite his wife and I don't want to do it, but it will afford me an opportunity to make something they hate and make them eat it.
(There is a sneaky link in this sentence.) The tramp stamp. Someone want to tell me why the stupid assed white stripes are covering a Tegan and Sara song? Isn't that song like brand fucking new?