You Shall Be My Queen

Right. There are days when I feel taller than I am. When I believe my hair is acceptable looking. When my shirt isn't so tight around my shoulders and my pants aren't too loose around my waist. Days when I don't need to look in the mirror to change lanes. When the random gas station I go into has Gatorade at the fountain. When the radio plays good music. These days are never when I go to the mall and consequently see retarded-hot girls.
This week is going by too fast. My vacation is almost over. Fuck.
My vacation sucks. It consists of me trying not to do laundry, then getting nagged to do laundry, followed by me getting yelled at to do laundry and culminating in me doing laundry. Other notable things I've done on my vacation is that I have drunk a lot of gin, played pogo, gotten snubbed on pogo, played with my dog and gotten snubbed by my dog.
Where have you been? I have missed you. I must leave now. You take care of yourself.
I hate living with my parents. I fucking hate it. Though the 16-year-old neighbor girl needs to come over and serve her country. I said it. Someone had to. So I did.
Christmas is coming. I want an attractive hooker and fireworks and a keg of beer. Man. Best Christmas ever.
I am part of the 25th Infantry Division. All this means to you is that I got the job I wanted. Booya.