No Phone No Pool No Pets
Right. I am the king of the road for one hour a day. I can straight fly. I'll let you in on how it's done - it's the shoes. I have never been so fast in my life. I am the king of pain for one hour a day. I can straight drink. I'll let you in on how it's done - it's the gullet. I have never been so empty in my life.
He's shot again.
Two Martinis from now I might realize I was feeling low when I finished my last beer, but more likely I'll be a Blue Hawaiian away from pining over some bitch who never cared for me. I'll just drink a couple Gin and Tonics instead and wait for the small hand to touch the 2.
Two Martinis ago, I didn't realize where I'd be two Martinis from now. I watched a Whiskey and Rye and a Gimlet sink into what can't be sunk. But by the time I catch up to the four White Russians I'm behind, the little hand will be almost reach the 3.
Two martinis later I might feel I'm a Manhattan away from Jim Bean helping me open a fifth of Bourbon. But by that time, the two Martinis I started off with will make me think thoughts of a woman who once cared for him but thought of me while she straddled him. By that time I'm a Guinness away from wiping that thought from my mind and the little hand will be on the 4.
Two Martinis from then, I'll have to make preparations for the next day. I'll say my prayers and have three Our Fathers and one Bloody Mary for breakfast. I'll realize I won't sleep when the little hand reaches 5.
I am the king of the road for one hour a day. I can straight fly. I'll let you in on how it's done - I feel no pain. I have never been so fast in my life.
posted by Yossarian at 10:41 AM
4 Comments:
two martins from 4 nights ago, i was 3 champagne glasses and two martinis short from doing something only whores do.
this was amazing.
So I saw your female scourge about a week ago at PF Chang's while I was eating with the new girl. Or at least I think it was her. She finally noticed me when she was leaving and she flinched. Awesome.
Nothing else to report. Expect Rachelle still thinks you're in Afghanistan. Guess she's out of a job now that Talent lost the election, the dumb whore.
Afghanistan is only a 6 month deployment. What a truely dumb whore. Except we never got down.
You're not going to believe this, but I met a Pascha out at a bar a week or so ago. I thought about a good hate fucking, but I just got drunk and got the flu instead.
how did you meet pascha out at a bar a weeks ago in frankfurt? yoss, things you are not telling.....many many many
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