I Want To Buy A Smart Car

Right. Sunday morning and no fucking pancakes. Lame. A Sunday without pancakes is like a girl without VD. Yeah you can do it, but it's a whole lot easier with it.
Here is something interesting about Germany, these people are worthless, shiftless layabouts. No one here wants to work. No one here wants to be successful. No one here wants a damn job. They just want to move slowly and not do a whole lot. Now, since it has been my dream to retire since I was 12, one might conclude that I would have found heaven. However, now that I have a job, bills, student loans and a desire to retire soon at a higher standard of living, I have determined that these people need jobs. I think I can pinpoint when I became my father on last Tuesday around noon.
Where are all the girls with jobs at? Where is an educated girl? Where is an ambitious girl? Not within a 15 mile radius of me that's where.
I am trying to figure out when I will start my all new one word posts. That will be much easier for me.
If I ever get my hands on a time machine, I will go back in time before cameras and all and rob the fuck out of banks, priceless artifacts and children. I will only steal the children in order to bring them to the future and do my bidding. Genius.
A beautiful thing the German culture has created is this beer that is half beer and half lemonade. That way beer is refreshing in the morning.
The fucking German people half up everything they do. Half cola and half water. Half soda and half orange juice. Half juice and half tea. Half woman half smelly unshaven layabout.
Germany isn't all bad, it will get better once I have my car. But that's when we start an offensive amount of training and deploying, so I might not see anything of anything. But who cares? It's fun for now. When I get closer to getting out, I doubt any of this will be fun, but for now it's good for a laugh. The funny thing I realized the other day is that I think a part of me joining the Army was for the whole breaking down and rebuilding thing. I was thinking about this as I ran and I realized I haven't been broken yet. Then it hit me, that I was broken before I even joined. But maybe I'm not broke, maybe I am completely perfect. Who knows? Who cares?
When I was a child all I wanted was to be Superman. Now, all I want is a whole lot of money.