ROYGBIV

Right. So I have to admit something. I must admit that I am of the contention that I will never make time with a woman for the remainder of my life. I saw this girl today at the post office and she looked through me. I swear to whichever deity you may or may not believe in. I am in line and go to her window to mail something. She looks at the line and says, "Who's next?" The old lady in line points at me, standing in her window, and she then takes my literal package, not my proverbial package, for mailing. I mean I honestly believe that if there were a bank entirely staffed by attractive women, then I could rob it, as I am invisible to them. My "superpower" is only enabled when the female of the species is in the same room. But who cares? In the big scheme of things it doesn't matter. In 1000 years no one is going to say, "Boy, I really wish the Yossarian would have been more popular with the ladies." They will say things like, "You want to take the next flight to Mars or wait for your brother?" Likewise, none of the great prophets of old said anything like, "Maybe more women should bed the Yossarian."
Speaking of which, why is it that prophets always have bad news? Where is the prophet who said, "1902 will be the year the Air Conditioning will be inventing, and it will be nice for people." You never hear about the good shit. "Then pavement will be invented thus keeping life less dusty," has never been foretold. All we hear about is the bad shit.
There are few things I hate in life. But I HATE it when PTI isn't on. That is my favorite show and ESPN preempts it all the time for golf, billiards or the spelling bee. I thought that ESPN 2 was for when they make stupid decisions, they just switch their programming. But apparently I am wrong.
Someone want to tell me why I ever listened to the Dead Kennedy's? Christ I must be old.