Cigarette Boat Float Around in Here

Right. Here is why multitasking sucks. Say you get used to doing multiple things at one time. It is only logical that at some point in time this skill will become second nature and you will do it all the time. Then you go to the bathroom. While taking a shit, you realize it is a good way to save time by fixing up the hair whist shitting. Well let us say, hypothetically of course, that the new pomade you bought is like wax and is very sticky, but you fail to realize this in your rush. Plus you are exhausted. Well, then the rest of the day you are peeling bits of toilet paper from your hand and trying to explain to the company commander how the pomade forced a bond between your hand and your toilet paper the likes of which Palmolive couldn't release. It's embarrassing. Hypothetically.
Back in the day, like two years ago when I was home from grad school, my friend K-Luv and I would frequent this one bar. At this bar we dubbed this one girl, "Cryin' shame." Why? Because she is pretty. Classically pretty. She had style too. The bar was an intimate one, if only because the same 12 people were there every night. So we proceeded to inquire around about her over some time. We also informed many people our intentions of being on Rikki Lake on account of her not knowing who her baby daddy is. Well we found out from this one guy, allegedly an old roommate, that she has herpes. Hence, the knick-name, "cryin' shame." Feel free to use that because it is funny.
Truth be told, I think she was so hot that we would have still fucked her. Battle scars are cool. Sure afterwards my jizzum would have been a corrosive load. But every girl likes a rash after a nice cum-soaking.
I am sorry. I usually don't talk like this. Yes I do, I just don't write about stuff like this. I just thought, that if you thought this shit is as funny as we thought, then you would enjoy that shit. But if you hate it, then I’m ass. And I'm tired of being the ass.
I'm just plain tired.
Men deserve to live free. But I guess it is up to your interpretation of "to."