I wish there were a prequel to Boomerang
Right. People need to shut the fuck up. I swear to god. I don't feel like getting into what brought that sentence on, just trust.
So I have been thinking about Star Wars. I like the movies and all but I have some things I want to address. First of all, in between episodes three and four I would assume that the Galactic Empire is doing a search of the galaxy for people whom may pose a threat. I know I would be looking for dude who cut my legs off and left me to burn to death. When the storm troopers show up on Tatooine looking for Obi Wan Kenobi, how the hell did they not figure shit out? "We are looking for an Obi Wan Kenobi. He is in hiding and is wanted for an attempt on the Dark Lord's life. He was last seen wearing Jedi robes." "Hmmmm, no. I can't say I have heard of an 'Obi Wan Kenobi.' There is a Ben Kenobi who lives out by the dunes. But he keeps to himself mostly," says some random junk dealer. "Well that clearly isn't the guy we are looking for." "Yeah he is always watching over Luke Skywalker. He doesn't do much else." "Thank you for your time. If you hear anything about an 'Obi Wan Kenobi' please let us know."
Shit man. How dumb can shit get? How were the Jedi able to figure out that Vader was Anakin? They couldn't figure out that Palpatine was a Sith, but a guy with no legs and melting when last seen clearly must be Vader.
Anyway. I am wildly popular in Michigan. People read my shit there like its literary crack. What the fuck is the hold up with K-Luv and Tron? Update shit.
Who the fuck is Lindsay Lohan? I mean I know she is famous. I just can't figure out why. What the fuck has she done?
So I paired up my phone to my car. Meaning now when I am driving and my phone rings I just hit a button and I talk to the caller through my stereo. Thus, everyone needs to call me whilst I am driving. Seriously. Everyone who reads this needs to call me. 636-328-16**. I feel safe putting my phone number out there because no one reads my site long enough to get to the picture let alone the end of this here posting.
posted by Yossarian at 7:58 AM
3 Comments:
Oh my god, man...
You're gonna get phone calls from all sorts of crazy people - not the people who actually read this blog on a regular basis, but just plain randoms...that should be interesting. You'll have to tell me how that went the next time you're in town - hopefully SOMEBODY calls you otherwise you'll become more depressed than you already are.
Also, do the Army people even make you DO anything? You seem to have plenty of time to check my blog throughout the day - breathlessly awaiting the next fascinating story, no doubt... Maybe I'll write a post about you. Hey, remember when you thought you were a vegetarian? I should write about that...
i keep getting a busy signal.
i think its pretty clear i WAS a vegetarian. i mean i didnt eat meat for like a year. I had to edit my number because i was getting calls while at work. it was awkard.
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