Flabbergast

Right. Christmas with Yossarian is always special. Off work early on Friday, and by early I mean I only worked for close to 14 seconds. So I bought some last minute plane fare and headed home. I surprised my mom and dad and I think I damn near gave her a heart attack. The Taste was unable to make it home because he is a bitch. Cheers to the underpants lady who informed me of the cheapness of Southwest Airlines. Jeers to the underpants lady for saying I looked like a merchant marine when I exited my plane and her and her man picked me up from the airport.
Now I am back and working and it's doldrums as usual. However, I can look forward to the next Holliday, New Years Eve and the consequent day itself. Fuck that. I hate that sham of a Holliday. I have never, in all my life, had a good time on this celebration of change. In fact, the one time I was having a good time, I was all set to get laid and I was taking an old friend and these two girls back to his house and my old car died. Sometimes life is funny. Sometimes the other girl throws fits and complains and I spend an hour in the snow waiting for someone to pick us up.
I hope everyone had a blessed Christmas and gave and received everything needed or wanted. I like Christmas, but it is no Saint Patrick's Day. Now there is a Holliday boy. I've always had a good time on that day. I don't think I ever got laid on one, but who cares? I've been so drunk that I had a cerebral orgasm every time.
Have you ever seen an angel? I knew one once for a brief moment in my life. She tasted the way I always imagined clouds taste. She smelled perpetually of diamonds. She was in constant subtle motion like a shark that would die if it stopped moving for a few seconds. Her touch felt quiet. I loved her as fiercely as I am capable. I loved how regardless of the expression on her mouth her eyes were smiling. I was in awe of how her mind worked. She is gone now though. She has more people to flummox and bless simultaneously. She must meet as many people on this earth as she can. This is God's way of letting people know his existence. We look to miracles or answered prayers, but we only need to look at her. She is the medium through which God shows his grace. She is aware of this and she has chosen to submit to it. Now all who meet her will know love. All who know her will feel devotedness. And all who feel her will never desire the feel of another.