Operating Room
Right. I know that is a played out picture. But fuck off because I took that one so it rules. It's way better than anyone you've ever seen before. Deal with it. It's out of my control. What is going on in your world? I'm interested. But only as interested as I have to be for the sake of keeping you around long enough for me to steal from your wallet. I don't even care if it is money I steal. I will get that crushed mint and business card from 1992 and 1987, respectively. It isn't my fault so much as it is yours, because you know I like to keep my breath fresh and call numbers that don't belong to whom I am calling any longer. I like to call them and ask for the previous owner of the number. Then I like to shuck and jive with them. You know this. You know how I live for short snippet adventures into lives of strangers. So if you would simply not keep them shits in your wallet, I wouldn't be forced to steal from you.
When my shit from Amazon gets here, I'll have something better to read. This crap I am trying to read now blows. It not only blows. It eats. It not only blows and eats. It sucks. It does anything you can think of relating to shoving a big mess of crap into your mouth.
Today, I did one pull up, 25 times, in a row. So I guess I did 25 pull ups. But I did like 100 throughout the day. I also ran 8 miles today. Fast. Under a 7 minute pace. But just under. I think the last mile was like 9. I was beat.
This sty on my eye is beginning to swell and puss and turn green and bloodshot my eye and all in all make it look like I have leprosy or some shit.
My piss still smells like popcorn.
I might need some help. I've got serious issues.
posted by Yossarian at 11:47 AM
9 Comments:
i would like to lance your sty.
pick up some Jonathan Ames. He's pretty dang cool...excellent in the literary skillz, and perverted and great. i finished "My Less Than Secret Life" and have just started "Wake Up Sir!". Try the secret life one first...igive it four out of four stars. it also has boxing and prostitutes.
there are a couple things you can do.
email me.
i may be dumb, but what is the deal with the upside down cross below.
i also forgot to say that in My Less Than Secret Life he talks about how joining the army was the worst mistake of his life and how he got out of the army.
i also don't know anything about popcorn smelling piss. maybe piss while watching a movie or something.
Maybe if you tried enriching your all-beer diet with some actual foodular sustenance, the popcorn smell would abate.
Just a thought.
Tiger piss smells like popcorn.
john the baptist was crucified on an upside down cross, that is his tomb
i salute you dangermouse
blurrrhhhhhhhhhppppppp.
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